Moving Forward...

I don’t know who all reads this, if anyone for that matter, but I don’t write these blogs for the benefit of anyone else but me. I am a writer. I am not always so eloquent in my speech, but God moves through my fingers as I write my thoughts on paper. He has gifted me with this and I believe that I haven’t even begun to see what He is going to do through my writing. I have many books to write. I have a book to write on dreams, and dreaming God’s dreams. I have books to write on marriage (not quite ready to write those yetJ), I may even have a few children’s books to write. But for now, this is where I right my inner most thoughts, my struggles, my hurts, my questions, my doubts, my dreams, my fears, my successes, my excitements, my joys, my journey. And if you so choose, you can share in each and every one of these moments. I can never express to you how much your attention means to me, how much I appreciate the time you take to read my blogs, sometimes my rants. It really does mean the world to me!
We are into day 11 of the New Year and God has been doing so much. I wish I could take the time to share everything that is in my heart, everything that the Lord has been talking to me about. I don’t have the time, nor do I feel like I can adequately express it here, right now. But, I will take a few minutes to share with you a few things:
I have already shared in an earlier blog about dreams. God dreams for me. He has dreams for me and He wants nothing more than watch me achieve them. HE DREAMS FOR ME, and because He dreams for me He is also the preserver of the dreams. I have to live out these dreams because the dreams He has for me are wrapped up into the dreams He has for someone else and so on. It isn’t an option for me to not live out His absolute best dreams for me…for me, I haven’t been given a choice.
Compassion: Let me talk a little bit about this. Ministry without compassion isn’t ministry. God’s heart is people. God loves people. He loves the hurting, the broken, and the vilest of people. How can we as a people of God live this life without compassion? Earthly empathy says, “Oh I am so sorry to hear that…” Compassion says, “I will do whatever I can to help you.” My prayer is that God would turn my heart into one of true compassion. I feel like if you have true compassion, then you will hold no judgment. It doesn’t seem like they can even be worn at the same time. This is a constant journey for me, one that I deal with everyday…I pray that God would give me His heart, that His heartbeat would be my heartbeat, that I would live in perfect rhythm with Him. EVERY DAY.I still don’t feel like I conveyed this well…but I tried

Do I still hurt? Of course. My heart is broken, I feel betrayed, but I know the One who heals. He is my best friend, the One who knows my deepest pain, and has been holding me through every tear. I know that I am learning and have learned so much already, and I know that this is just one more experience that has shaped me and prepared me for the dreams that God has for me. I loved hard and because of that, I have hurt hard. Would I have changed it? No, I don’t think so. Even in my hurt, I can see how much God loved me, how He protected me, how He is carrying me into a dream that I can’t even imagine. I know that He loves me more than anyone else ever will, and it’s through that love that I will discover everything He desires for meJ So, don’t worry about me…He has promised me that He will always be with me, and that He will heal me in His time, it will be quick, it has to be quick, because I can’t afford to waste time on my past…I have a future that is waiting for me, and I have to fulfill dreams so others can live out their destinies! I have so many options…so many ways in which I can go…I only want to go where He is leading. So, pray that as He leads I will KNOW. Pray that I will continue to stay in tune with Him so much so that I don’t even miss a beat, that I hear Him and I step exactly where He wants me to…not a moment too soon or too late. My past will not define me, I am moving forward.

Dreaming with Him,

Andrea