New Beginnings!

I've been thinking alot about this year...the year 2012...about the things I had hoped for, the dreams I had...etc.  As I look back, as we are about to close out 2012, I remember so many things.  I remember what my life looked like this time last year.  I was emotionally connected to someone that I loved with my entire being-who was becoming connected with someone else while I wasn't looking.  I was sad, I was depressed, I was confused about my purpose in life, what I wanted, etc.  Honestly, I was living a life of disobedience.  Satan is sly like that...he gets in and then before you realize it, you are in deep.  I was lonely and I wasn't seeking God like I should have been...when that happens it's a setup waiting to happen.  I gave him a foothold...by the time I realized what had happened, what I had done...it was too late.  I was already so in love that I figured I could "him.  I could make him want the same things I wanted, love God the way I thought he needed to, be who I knew he could be...THEN I went to this thing called "THE RAMP" and my life was forever changed.  I can't explain what happened, and I can't believe that it hasn't even been a year yet.  God drastically changed me.  He gave me hope, joy, delivered me from the fear of man.  He showed me that He has a destiny for my life and asked me to dream His dreams for me.  I came back a different Andrea.  Completely different.
Throughout this year I lost love, I felt pain.  I know what it feels like to be betrayed, to be cheated on, to find out that everything you believed to be true was a lie.  I know what it's like to grieve the death of dreams, love, life as I knew it.  I know what it's like to have everything stripped away from you and to be left with nothing, or at least what feels like nothing.  I know what it's like to sacrifice.  You see, God has always chased me, pursued me.  He has always been trying to get my attention, to take me to a greater level with Him.  No matter what I wanted, what my flesh wanted, my spirit, my soul, ALWAYS wanted Him more than anything else.  My flesh wasn't strong enough to give everything up on my own, so my prayer was for His help...and although I would have saved myself alot of pain and heartache if I would have done it myself, He helped me.  Even though I let Satan deceive me, to distract me from God's dreams for me, God was still pursuing me.  He was still chasing me.  He is still chasing me, still pursuing me.  This year of 2012---as I mentioned in an earlier blog--I learned that He is enough.  God is enough for me.  I have learned about the kind of love I deserve, the kind of love I desire.  I don't want to be pursued by a love that is selfish, that turns to another when it gets to be too much work.  I have learned what is and is not okay.  I have learned that God loves me so much that He has created a man out there for me that is praying for me.  As I pursue the Lord, and as he pursues the Lord, God will lead us to pursue each other. 
So, although 2012 was a year that I was asked to sacrifice much, to walk away from much, I am thankful for the lessons learned.  And I am more thankful that soon I can put 2012 behind me and look towards 2013! 2013 will be a year of new beginnings! A year that puts my "above and beyond' into action!  So, keep your eyes on this blog, I will write about my new beginnings, the new things that God is going to be doing in my life, in the life of my family.  2013 will see my brother being released from prison, it will see my new job, new car, and who knows, possibly even a husband:)!  You never know...

Still dreaming His dreams,

Andrea