One Year Ago Today...

A year ago today the Quinney family's lives changed forever.  Taking myself back to exactly a year ago, I had to remind myself to breath every breath.  I was so low in the valley that even seeing the mountain was impossible.  It was so dark, so deep, so desperate.  I was angry at God for the outcome.  I was so angry!  I didn't see a way out, I didn't have any hope in this God that I lived my entire life believing in.  It had already been such a hard year for me personally, I didn't think I could take any more.  I remember crying myself to sleep for months.  I remember the pain that I felt, the blow to the stomach that hit me every single day for weeks.  I remember wondering how I was going to make it through every day, much less the weeks, the months that were to come.  I remember wondering how we were going to make it through birthdays, holidays, without him.  I remember wondering how I would ever be able to carry on with my life, knowing that he wasn't going to be around.
Yet, here I am...one year later.  We made it through the holidays, the birthdays.  We survived.  I have carried on with my life, although it hasn't been easy, I have done it.  I never thought I would be able to look back at this past year and be thankful for anything---but, I am SO THANKFUL that I have a God who is faithful.  He has always come through for me.  He has never left me, never forsaken me.  There are things that this Quinney family has faced, that many of you may never know about or understand, but I can tell you that because of HIM, we have come through!!  No, this journey is not over, but I can look forward with my head held high, with peace knowing that the best is yet to come!  I KNOW that my brother will be free.  I KNOW that he will share holidays and birthdays with us again, and soon.  I know that he will be there when I get married.  I am so thankful that I have a God who cares more about us than we care about each other.  I am thankful that I have a Father who really does know best.  I am thankful that He sees the whole puzzle when I only see the piece in my hand.  I am just so thankful!
We are a blessed family, we are a greatful family, we are a changed family!

Blessed to breath again,

Andrea